Butterfly Sparks Designs

Thursday, March 27, 2014

A Break in Springtime

Well, a miracle of all miracles has occurred and BOTH boys are asleep now. WHAT? I'm at loss for what to do with this new found freedom. This hasn't happened in years;  BOTH boys napping! I guess putting them in their room for "time out" must've been just what the doctor ordered.Yes, this spring break has been fun, but exhausting for all.

We've played hard at home. ( well, i clean more than play).  Bennett creates every chance he can get, and Amos follows suit in his own fashion. Legos and Trash Packs have been front running toys...pillows and blankets have been confiscated off beds and transformed into forts, stuffed animals have become students in classrooms, and every item we own in the house has been unearthed from hiding and used in some sort of play. The house is messy and full of life again.
i forgot how quiet the house grows when Bennett is in school.

Outside there are hints of springtime; warm swirling breezes, pear trees coming alive with white bloom, and daffodils rising from their slumber - happy and yellow. They remain strong against the lingering cold that visits the night. The birds sing with sunrise and the light grows stronger than darkness. It's a welcome change as this winter has been dark and full of such heart break around us...it seeped in through the door cracks of our hearts and broke them in many ways. It seems that Kevin and i are slowly recovering...slowly daring to smile again alongside Spring.

The Boys and i went to see Frozen in the theatre. A rare expense for our household. The anticipation and giddy incessant talk from them made me SO happy. What joy God must have in giving his children good gifts. Their eyes glued to the big screen...their little bodies lighter than the heavy theatre chairs that sandwiched them in.

We went as a family to the zoo and saw the "live"dinosaurs roar. This exhibit was in town and ALL OF NASHVILLE decided to come to it. As we walked in Kevin made the point that " no children or adults were smiling" as they left the zoo. They looked tired,  miserable, and defeated. .NEVERTHELESS we ignored those warning signs and went ahead and paid way too much  and stood in the long line with all of Nashville for the small walk through Dino-land. As we walked through Amos held tight to us with wonder and fear! That made it all kinda worth while.

Daddy caught the mole that had been digging up our yard all winter..I mocked his obsession with catching this notorious mole...until i saw the joy it brought the boys once he actually caught it. The boys were in heaven seeing that mole. We let it ride with us to birmingham, Al...and let it go at a gas station. Ever since then, one of their favorite past times has been  hiding underneath pillows and blankets while daddy "digs" up the moles.

Kevin and I sang in Nicki Davis and Jeff Kitners' wedding. I forgot the words during one of the songs and that sucked big time making me question why i was singing at all any more. The ceremony was beautiful , small and simple, and I was yet honored to sing as the bride walked down!  Her moment. Seeing the brides facial expressions...the grooms gaze. It was a gift for sure.

We stayed with Mallory and her crew afterwards at their large and lovely home! It woke me up in the most beautiful way.
Bennett and Amos played hard with Gray, Kate and Avery. It was a warm and happy home, noisy with laughter ... old friends catching up and new ones being made. It was only one hour and before  bed Bennett said Gray was his best friend.  Mallory and Matt make it look easy. i left wanting more children:). Kevin had to talk reality back into me, mile by mile,  on the long drive to Macon, Ga.
The flowers were braver down south...coming out to play in the warmth. the colors dancing everywhere made it feel more like spring. The light pink Cherry Blossoms were full bloom reminding me that everything is beautiful in it's time.

We visited Kevin's Parents and grandma...the boys tried to swim in the pool that was still too cold from winter. It reminded me of how i used to play...undaunted by temperature...... wanting to grab life up and live it to the fullest. I want that to be that awake again..( where have i gone? )

We visited Grammie...she and i talked like two chatty girlfriends..while Kevin shook under the covers with oncoming illness....The poor guy got strep throat somewhere along the way and was out for the count for two days....sleeping miserably, cold and hot, for 2 days. NO FUN.

i drove us to my parents to visit....the boys ADORE grandpa fiercely and played hard while mom and i visited. We saw Amy, Scott and kids for dinner.  Bennett cried SO hard leaving Grandpa's presence .....like i've never seen him do in a long while. He was tired...but he's truly in love with Grandpa.

Amos is in SUCH a cute and sweet stage. He isn't so adamant about fighting for his 3 year old way any longer...each word that comes out of his mouth is marked with wonder, questioning, and a new confidence. He exudes cuteness from every pore...it makes me scoop him up and hug him...kissing his cheek till he pushes me away....UG!!! CUTENESS!!! I. CANT. STOP. HUGGING. HIM!!

i struggled with a bunch of inner things along the way...(gassy tummy yes), but more deep matters of the heart. The open roads opened pandoras box inside my head....i felt the crossroads in my life...lots of questions. I wanted to be home in my personal space away from  judging or being judged..( which is all my issue). i am so deeply thankful for my home and family. I am SO thankful for my God who keeps me in the palm of His hands......for the lot in life He's blessed me with for now. Thank You Jesus. Truly. Thank YOU.

When we arrived home the check from Secret Road was there!!! After 1/2 a year  of looking in my mailbox..it ARRIVED!!!! He makes everything beautiful in its time. The time for fruition was here..the  time for singing and celebrating..the commercial was up and running in Europe. Our song!! a dream realized... speaking to me once again of my Fathers love for me personally.....We watched the commercial over and over.Well, i did.  I celebrated by spreading the news on facebook which immediately made me feel guilty like i was bragging or something...but i think deep down, i only wanted to remind people, remind me, that God does good things.

Kevin is slowly coming back to life with the antibiotic.  The boys have messed up the clean home in impressive timing...they are playing well together one minute and fighting hard the next. Hence, the time out that led to a long overdue NAP!!!! and this blog entry...

I am Thankful ...outside the air is warm. I am heading outside for some alone time. Its long overdue too:)

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